What is real confidence?
I started work with an executive this week whose impact is strong. He has a bold, impressive presence and personality that commands attention. He is, at least in the conventional sense, confident. However, after an hour of speaking with him I realised something different.
The truth is that he feels that he has not lived up to his potential in a number of areas. Whenever he gets close to achieving an important goal he withdraws or gets distracted. His motivation wanes. My guess is that it is safer to maintain the story that I ‘woulda coulda’ had I tried than to really put myself on the line, give it everything, and risk failure.
Is this real confidence?
To me confidence is the willingness to be everything you are and everything you are not. It is self-acceptance, not bravado. It is the courage to be open and honest about who you really are – to own and make peace with this where possible – and to engage with life’s challenges from this foundation.
Through this lense, the quietest person in the room may actually be the most confident.
Have a great week everyone.
